Yesterday (Friday) at 4 pm I received a call from the surgeon’s office letting me know that surgery has been scheduled for May 30. The day before Katelyn’s 12th birthday. I have to wonder if they did that on purpose. I had asked them to not schedule it on her birthday for obvious reasons to me, so instead I will still be in the hospital on her special day. Katelyn is my pink child. I always swore off the color for my daughters, never wanting to swathe them in something that I saw as such a bias towards girls. But when she was old enough to express her opinion, pink (hot pink) always won. She loved the color and wore it practically every day in preschool. The bright pink contrasted beautifully with her white blond hair.
I am inspired by Kal Hourd’s song, ” When Pink Is Just A Color Again”. I’ve heard the phrase before but it takes on so much more meaning when you are diagnosed with breast cancer and have daughters. Even more so when you join your aunts and mom in sharing the “survivor” title. My gene test for BRCA1 and BRCA2 came back negative which is a huge relief, but I also know that my children are at a very high risk for developing this mutililating disease.
I pray for a world that no longer needs a pink ribbon to create awareness of breast cancer. When pink ribbons are worn as hair bows and no other meaning is attached. I pray for the day that I can look at the color and not think about the horrifying decision I have faced to save my own life. I pray for the day when pink is just a color again.